Cranberry Juice

To the lady on the train that was too interested in my personal life... back off.


There is something about me that just makes people want to tell me things.  No matter where I go, I find myself talking to total strangers about all kinds of things, including some very personal details.  Standing in line anywhere, I usually hear about someone's love life, or their health problems, or how hard it is to find good underwear (yes, that was a real conversation).  About 90% of the time I don't mind at all; people fascinate me and I am totally willing to listen to their stories.  8% of the time it annoys me as I am usually in a hurry or not feeling well and I really don't want to listen.  The other 2% of the time, though, it really pisses me off.  This morning was a 2% morning.

There I was, sitting peacefully on the train, drinking cranberry juice and trying to read my book.

 

Then she got on the train...

Her: Hi.

Me: G'morning.

Her: Do you have a UTI?

Me: Nnnnnnnnnoo...

Her: It means a Urinary Tract...

Me: Yeah, I know what it means.

Her: So do you have one?

Me: No!

Her: But you're drinking cranberry juice!

Me:  Yes.  I like cranberry juice.

Her: Women only drink cranberry juice when they have a UTI.

Me: Yes.  Also, when they like cranberry juice!

Her: You don't have to be shy, honey, we're all friends here.

Me: No, actually, we're all strangers who happen to ride the same train.

Her: Well, for a UTI what you really should be doing is...

Me: Lady, seriously, I just want to drink my juice, and read my book.

Her: Well! When that UTI gets worse you just come find me and I will tell you how to fix it for good.

Me:  Sure thing.

 For the record, I really do just like cranberry juice.

So, to the lady on the train that was too interested in my personal life... mind your own business.  And back off!