Liquid Karma

To the guy on the train that purposefully spilled his coffee on the seat... the joke's on you, pal!

There seems to be a new trend on New Jersey Transit.  People are going to new levels to try to make sure they get a seat to themselves, especially when sitting in a two-seat row. 

Now, we would all be much happier if we all got a seat to ourselves on the train, able to sit more comfortably all the way to our destination.  Most of us realize, however, that there are other passengers who may want a seat, and so we understand that the ride will be slightly less comfortable, but not uncomfortable, slightly less private, but by no means invasive. 

Just people sitting in the seat next to us.

In the olden days, people would just pile their extra bags on the seat next to them to try to dissuade others from asking for a seat. It didn't always work, as those of us with a little hutzpah would wait patiently while they moved their bags to the overhead rack, or simply put them on their laps. 

Or they would spread their dinner out next to them, eating slowly and deliberately in hopes that no one would dare ask them to move it.

Nowadays, though, there is a new trend: people are sitting in the aisle seat, purposely pouring some liquid on the seat next to them, and then sitting back to enjoy their private seat.  People come along and ask to sit, only to be told that "someone spilled something there" in mock sympathy. 

The first time I saw this I thought it was a singular event.  The next time I thought that, maybe, it was the same person. 

I have now seen this being done many times, and it's obnoxious.

Today, though, Karma got involved.

The guy got on the train, found his aisle seat, and promptly spilled some leftover coffee onto the one next to him.

The important thing to note, is that for the majority of the ride the train is in motion.  The physics of liquids, especially when not contained, are varied and unpredictable.  And he was wearing khaki pants.

There he was, smug look firmly attached to his face, eyes closed, enjoying his morning private seat, warning people away from the "spill."

No one said anything to him about this behavior, though I'm sure that many were tempted by the looks on their faces.  We were contained.

The liquid not so much.

As we arrived in the city and stood up to leave, there were many twitters of laughter happening behind him.  It turns out that Karma sent that coffee in the direction of his khaki pants, a long, brown stain emerging on his left butt cheek.  He must have shifted at some point allowing more liquid to encroach his hind region (or Karma has more tricks up her sleeves than we realized) because that stain had spread to his middle. 

I don't envy him the day he was about to have, how many times he would need to explain away the brown stain on his butt.  I don't envy him having to walk the city in those coffee stained, khaki pants.

But... Karma.

So, to the guy on the train that purposefully spilled his coffee on the seat,Karma's a bitch, liquid Karma even more so.  And the joke's on you, pal!  I hope you'll think twice before doing that again.